Kalim The Great Escape

The Great Escape

It was a beautiful day on the fifth of April at the Savannah. We were coming back from migrating. So far it had been a great trip and we had not ran into any predators yet. my son, wife and I were at the head of the herd so we were in charge of them. If only this grass did not  blind us from lions.

I stopped because I smelt something suspicious and I looked around. The grass was moving but it was not grass it was a lion pride. I quickly turned my herd around because I heard them running towards my herd, so my herd ran as fast as they could. Then I saw them catch my son and he fell into the lake with the lion pride. They all circled my son and I could feel my anger taking over.  So I ran to get the herd so we would stand a chance.

My son was swimming in the lake with the lions trying to get his horns off so that he would not fight back. Then a crocodile came into the fight. My son must have thought that he was a stretchy band. After the crocodile let go of my son because he was getting sore teeth from all  the pulling.

After the rest of the herd got back the lions started backing away from my son. He knew he was not meant to take my son in the first place. So I charged at one of the lions and he went flying into the air. Then the other lions started to run away, but one of them did not, so I ran at him but he got away before I could get him.Then my son was safe. After all that my son went through, he went to  taste the grass so he could get his energy up from all the fighting with the lions.

Finally my son was safe with us. He looked really happy to see us, but after all of that he survived an attack from a lion pride and a crocodile. But one day he will have to face his enemy once again, but we do not have to worry about that until the time comes.

By Kalim

The Great Escape (First Draft)

Term 2 Week 3

W.A.L.T recall  events through the eyes of an animal.

Success Criteria

I know I will be successful when my recount has a

• Title
• Orientation:  When? Who? Where? Why?
• Sequence of events:  What happened? Describe using the senses (hear, taste, see, smell and feel).
• Personal Comment:  How did the event

First Draft

The Great Escape

It was a beautiful day on April the fifth at the savanna. We were coming back from migrating. So far it had been a great trip and we had not ran into any predators yet. Me, my son and my wife were at the head of the herd so we were in charge of them. If only this grass did not blind us from lions.  

I stopped because I smelled something and looked around I quickly turn my herd around because I saw a lion pride. I heard them  running towards my herd  so my herd ran as fast as they could. Then I saw them catch my son and he fell into the lake with the lion pride. They all circled my son and I could feel my anger taking over so I ran to get the herd so we would stand a chance. My son was swimming in the lake with the lions trying to get his horns off so that he would not fight back. Then a crocodile came into the fight my son must of thought that he was a stretchy band. After the crocodile let go of my son and the rest of the herd got back the lions started backing away from my son. One by one the lions started to run away but one of them did not so I ran at him and helped him get away from my son by giving him a huge push then my son was safe. After all that my son went through he went to  taste the grass so he could get his energy up.

Finally my son was safe with us, he looked really happy to see us but after all of that he survived from a pride of lions and a crocodile. But one day he will have to face his enemy once again, but we do not have to worry about that until the time comes.